This. THIS.
I very much resemble my icon right now.

Tiny things that make me happy:

I'm absolutely desperate to make an update but I haven't the foggiest idea what to talk about.

.....no, seriously, what.

In slight reference to this post, can I just say that, quite possibly, Charmelia >> Chasleyne.

Here's a strange request.

Is anyone aware of an actor, sportsman or any other variant of celebrity that could pass as a young Boris Johnson?

In case you're not British, or you're from London and have successfully managed to install a hefty mental block, here is what Boris Johnson looks like:









He needs to be not so fat. And somewhere between 15 and 25, ish. A footballer would do. Really, it's the shock of white-blonde hair and the perpetually confused look that I'm after.

Set to work, minions!
Um, I mean please help if you can. Thank you!

Dear Britney,

What the hell,

Love your increasingly uncomfortable fan, Karis.

Stolen from darthsarah  because EEE.

Gay Penguins Hatch And Raise A Penguin Baby
By Meredith Woerner, 1:20 PM on Wed Jun 3 2009, 3,223 views


Sexual experimentation on the part of German penguins has concluded with one happy couple, and their adopted chick. Let the gay penguins of the world be an example to the rest of you.

In 2005 the German zoo attempted to test sexual orientation of homosexual penguins. According to the BBC, "Three pairs of male penguins had been seen attempting to mate with each other and trying to hatch offspring from stones." The zoo tried to fly in female penguins to get the males to mate with them, but gay rights activists protested, and the zoo decided to see if the male penguins really could make a family on their own.

So the zoo went ahead and gave the aquatic birds an abandoned egg to rear:

"Z and Vielpunkt, both males, gladly accepted their 'Easter gift' and got straight down to raising it," said a zoo statement.

Fast forward to today, and you have a healthy and happy baby chick ready for its own sitcom (I'm going to call it, Two And A Half Penguins.)

The fathers have been behaving, "just as you would expect a heterosexual couple to do. The two happy fathers spend their days attentively protecting, caring for and feeding their adopted offspring."

Penguins, the forward thinking socially embracing animals of tomorrow.


The only way this story could be more relevant to my interests is if one of them pulled a cake from behind its flipper.

Damnit. I want to do the anonymous writer feedback meme, except I never write anything, and when I do only seven people see it.
And they'll just be nice.

(THE ANONYMOUS WRITING FEEDBACK MEME)

In other news, I am making a sausage casserole and Not Revising. Join me as I cast the occasional guilty look over at my abandoned lecture notes.



Guilty Puppy is guilty. Guilty Puppy suspects that exam failure is imminent.

Oh, Charlie. ♥

This years revision mnemonics:

( Spoilers! In my revision! Spoilers! )

In conclusion, OMGFANGIRL.

Visibility, Consistency, Familiarity, Affordance
Navigation, Control, Feedback, Recovery, Constraints
Flexibility, Style, Conviviality -  hurrah!

You remember when I said that this was "the most astounding marriage of fur, felt and filth that you may ever witness"?

( Well, )

I guess I lied to you.

This could possibly be construed as unsafe for work. Don't blame me, blame them.
and the 70s.
and nudist colonies in the winter.

I have been watching this intermittently all night.
The first 1:10 is a violation of all of your sweetest childhood memories.
The remaining 1:26 is the most astounding marriage of fur, felt and filth that you may ever witness.

Apparently this was made for a degree course. What kind of lucky bastard gets to go to university and muck about with Muppets footage for three years?


Oh christ. 2:06.

Wait. Wait. No, Wait. WAIT. NO.
DON'T ALL RIPEN AT ONCE, FUCKSAKE.

You don't get this shit with a mars bar.


latenightcuppa  gave me another five things. Hee. You see? This meme is glorious. It has exploded all over my friendslist and I love it. Lets do another round.



* I get hideously emotional over documentaries; usually because the documentary makers are subjective twats who ask leading questions and use condescending tones and disgusted body language and I get really defensive of the people they're interviewing, but also because, well, they're sad and by nature are about things that shouldn't happen to people, but do anyway.

P.S. (does a P.S go before an asterisk thingy, or after?) I dunno what to have for tea. It was meant to be roast beef, but chuh, effort. Suggestions? I'm hungry! And lazy! Wah!

Here.
And even more beautifully, here.
I fail to see how anyone could not smile at this.

Questions for Americans (or Well-informed Others)

- is Gossip Girl finished?! It didn't feel like it was finished. Is it finished??
- Why is there no new Dollhouse episode on torrent?!
- Why has 30 Rock suddenly weirded out in it's scheduling? Did it change days?
- WHY IS YOUR TELLY SO INCONSISTENT? I HAVE NOTHING TO WATCH WHEN THIS HAPPENS.*

thank you,
Dependent Islander x


*Not true. Yesterday I spend the entire evening watching BBC 4 programmes on the iPlayer, as a result i went to bed feeling very informed and cultured.
But today is a new day and I want TRASH TV.**


**Obviously I do not want to imply that your telly is trash, of course it isn't. But guuuuys, sometimes you make it kinda hard.

(left click save target)

Sledgehammer - Peter Gabriel
The Man Who Sold The World - David Bowie
Haylcon On & On - Orbital
Zooropa - U2
Vienna - Ultravox
Original - Leftfield
Hollow - Tricky
Dont Give Up - Peter Gabriel & Kate Bush
Inner City Life - Goldie
Some Things Come From Nothing - Super Furry Animals
You're Not Alone - Olive
Red - Elbow
Shiver - Coldplay
There's More To Life Than This - Bjork
Sitting On The Dock Of The Bay (take 1) - Otis Redding
Are You That Somebody? - Aaliyah
At The River - Groove Armada
Just Looking - Stereophonics
Miserable Girl - Soulwax
Dub Be Good To Me - Beats International
Don't Break My Heart - UB40
Fun For Me - Moloko
Feeling Oblivion - Turin Brakes
Shout - Tears For Fears
Sorted for Es and Whizz - Pulp



Weirdly, when I sit down to compile a list of tracks I've loved/felt nostalgic for/associated with important events in the last 25 years... none of my favourite bands feature. Hmm.

Anyway yes, it's my birthday. Happy birthday to me, la la.

I just sat and worked out the bare minimum mark I need to pass, and I don't care who knows it.

This is absolutely the best question I have ever seen on Yahoo!Answers. Someday I myself hope to travel the world, with a walking cane and bowler hat, making people feel uncomfortable in their own homes as I openly scrutinise everyone's dining attire.

Just don't use a knife to cut your spaghetti. We throw people in prison for that sort of thing.

Nobody said anything about contact lenses splitting.

Oh, and I also fell up a step and twisted my ankle today.


WORLD. FUCK OFF.